Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it

so well I have no idea wether or not they fired me about last night or not because my alarm broke yay so i didnt wake up till like noon and i was suppossed to be at work at 11.

so now my moms talking about her getting a part time job and me staying home and doing the housework etc.... i really need ot look for a work study job or osmething and financial id and student loans and move the hell out asap

Current Mood: distressed

anywhho im in school now yaya me getting good grades but im thinking of changing my major to english with a focus on childrens lit what do you think

Current Mood: my house is freezing

this is hillarious humu your brother is a smartass but it does make sence really any who put a smile on my face so ill sahre it with you guys.


A Simple Question If every terrorist the U.S. kills is a shahid (martyr) and will go to heaven, then aren't we doing them a favor by sending them there sooner? By killing terrorists aren't we just respecting their culture? They have defined us as the enemy, so aren't we just playing the part they want us to? Shouldn't the multiculturalists be FOR killing more terrorists?

Current Mood: amused

so im laying there in the mri thingy today and i started thinking. whne i was little i was afraid of very little i was fearless i would except and dare take on any challange. mt friend fabien and i had a tree house pretty high up in a tree the consited of a piece of plywook lated acroos two branches we wound jump on that thing and looking back i realize we could have easily killed ourselves. and there was a time i rode my friends bike that was way to big for mee down my street which was a hill and the brakes didnt work luckily my dad was out side our house and cought me but i dontremeber being too afraid then i used to dig up bugs i dont know why but i did noe any bugs freaks me out especially spiders. but why is that why did i have this fearlessness when i was young that now many things terrify me. i mean i would never now climp on top of the monkey bars and walk along the wooden beam. or grap the bar at the top of the giant metal slide flip over it then slide doen the slide.

Current Mood: contemplative

as you aqll might know im somewhat of an einstein groupie so i thought this was facinating.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/TECH/space/04/02/einstein.satellite.ap/index.html

check it out.

Current Mood: contemplative

i woke up this morning to the sound of birds chirping i wanted to shoot them is that wrong oh well if it is they should know better than to sound so damn chearfull that early. i went to see the quack today but he wasnt there some other dr was she wasnt as bad she orderd some kind of test for me to take so who knows maybe something will actuallt get done. i decided tocall out of work. told them my shoulder hurts which in truth it does but this injury id bad i use uit as an excuse to call out when i justdont feel like going.

Current Mood: cranky

So yai havnt written here in ages but that is cuz well i suck at keeping journals. But today is my 22nd bday and it actually hasnt been that bad so far most of my friends rembered it was my bday my books came in that i ordered and im having chinease for dinner...much better than most of my birthdays. I actually got up and brushed my hair and got dressed today enen though im not going anywhere.

Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: none im too damn lazy to look for my cd player

qhy the fuck is she such a fucking bitch.first she starts yelling at me cuz shes to fucking dumb to copy and paste stuff. then she decides shes gpoing to clean some and starts saying shit like im the only one who fucking ever does anything here which is her way of saying i should clean thw houise but im a fucking lazy bitch so im going to make you do it.then i dare say something to her ans she starts threatning to kick me out and tells me i have to take the bus to work well fuck her fine i will move the fuck out but see if i give her any more of my fucking money and if she doensnt like it too fucking bad.i dont know how but ih vae to get the fuck out soon

Current Mood: enraged

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i just want to go up stairs crawl in to bed and never come out but i fea if i go upstairs in my room and am alone with my self i might hurt myself so i will instead stay on here and go play swg

i cant breath i cant cry i cant stop shakingi feel nausious that was the hardest thing i ever had to do.but i knew if our project was t osuceed i had to get that part out of the way before i let the fear take over and i gave up.

Current Mood: sufficating

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Current Mood: depressed

for a while now i have dodged odd looks at resterants for ordering diet coke with lime well :P to them because in k mart today guess what i saw yes coke the only hthing i worship above my starbucks coffe now makes diet coke with lime premixed. wwooooohoooo. now i can again be lazy and not cut up limes and make it myself.

i was feeling very bummed out and lonley so i went shopping today probably not the smartest thing to do but i mostly only bought things i need. i got a really cute pair of pants there kakis with pink accents and a pink tshirt and a red rose silky shirt all but the pants were on clearece oh and some comfy sweats to lay around the house in. i also got a homedics spa kit a footspa nail and pedicure kit and facial spa thinmaging on clearence at target for 20bucks gotta love target. ooh and sharpies in all kinds of pretty colors. but thats it no more spending for me im limiting myself to 2 dollars a day for lunch and that is it..

first of all i had to get up at 5 o clock this morning after not going to bed till one. then why oh why does every fuckhead moron and jackass get on my line. why. i mean i dont make the fucking policy i just follow it and if this one ass hole calls me a "smart girl" one more time im gonna deck him fuck my job. then mycos doesnt close my register in time and even after i close my line this old lady gets in it and swears she was in it before i closed so i had to take her. then she refused to put her shit on the belt and told me after i started ringing it up she needed seperate bills.then because of this lad i got out of work 20 minutes late and got bitched out at by my mother and she left a nasty voicemail message on my phone i havnt listened to it yet im sure its the same as the other if your not out here blah blah blah your ass be fucking walking blah blah blah.

Current Mood: stressed

I won i won i won woohoo i won oh ya haha i didnt lose lol :P. so after my big day in ac which was actually a pretty good day my mom was actually being nice to me.. i also am up over 500 bucks oh ya thats going in the bank tuesday into my get the hell out fund. oh ya and borgata sucks first they wouldnt let me gamble cuz my license expired if i was 25 theyd let me gamble with an expired license but since im only 21 they wont what is 25 any morre legal to gamble i mean jeeze. then they lose our car for over an hour.

Current Mood: excited

i had a very nice nite life is good at least for now ee dr portis i wont freeze like that so :P wish me luck in ac tommorw err today lol i need 5k comeone baby momma needs to get the hell out. im in such a good mood i jope i have a good dream and remeber it that would nake it perfect.

Current Mood: jubilant

please can i can i can i cant i just marry some really old guy worth billions and wait for him to die. a really old guy with a heart condition and no living relatives. i go into work this morning mege groggy from the nyquill i took last nite and an eveil bad stomach ache and guess where they stick me flatbed woohoo lane of crazys and lazy ass people. well i had it today i made everyone lift there own heavy shit and just scanned it. The trip to A.C tommorow might be cancelled as i cannot get a hold of missy. bah damn her she never answers her phone she probably ropped it in the toilet again. but on the plus side i might be able to save some money this week if i dont go.

Current Mood: high

ok so heres whats going on in my life/day. so theres this guy were kinda in a relantionship if nothing else were really good friends. any way hes going off to korea and well hes kinda been ignoring me the last couple of days and something he said to me kinda made me think hes been doing the same thing i have trying not to care to much about each other. Also my brother has given me the flu and i am sick as hell and cannot go to the doctor as i have no insurance and am boke as hell. so im feeling sad and vulnurable and then what happens my exboyfriend sends me an im. this is a guy who came into my life when i was very down and i hated myself and didnt even realize i hated myself which i think is very dangerous at least if you know you hate yourself you can look out for guys like these. it wasnt a healthy relarionship as i got my feeling of selfworth from the fact that someone actually loved me and he took advantage of that and i let him overlooking all his lies and half truths until i just couldnt anymore. ps ty hu for helping me see i deserve better. well i have to go now the nyquil is kicking in and im getting spacey so goodnite. tommorow should be fun i get to work 8 hours with the flu lifting lots of heavy stuff and dealing with rude ass people.

Current Mood: sad
Current Music: evenessence imagination/paper flowers i cant remeber the nam

i friendd of mine recenrlt created one of these and well im sick dpressend and stir crazy so i thought what the hell lets give it a go.

Current Mood: crappy