| She is now quite awake, and look so well as I... 33 |
[Jan. 28th, 2010|02:20 am] |
She is now quite awake, and look so well as I never saw her since that night at Carfax when we first enter the Count's houseI am amaze, and not at ease thenBut she is so bright and tender and thoughtful for me that I forget all fearI light a fire, for we have brought supply of wood with us, and she prepare food while I undo the horses and set them, tethered in shelter, to feedThen when I return to the fire she have my supper readyI go to help her, but she smile, and tell me that she have eat alreadyThat she was so hungry that she would not waitI like it not, and I have grave doubtsBut I fear to affright her, and so I am silent of itShe help me and I eat alone, and then we wrap in fur and lie beside the fire, and I tell her to sleep while I watchBut presently I forget all of watchingAnd when I sudden remember that I watch, I find her lying quiet, but awake, and looking at me with so bright eyesOnce, twice more the same occur, and I get much sleep till before morningWhen I wake I try to hypnotize her, but alas! though she shut her eyes obedient, she may not sleepThe sun rise up, and up, and up, and then sleep come to her too late, but so heavy that she will not wakeI have to lift her up, and place her sleeping in the carriage when I have harnessed the horses and made all readyMadam still sleep, and she look in her sleep more healthy and more redder than beforeAnd I am afraid, afraid, afraid! I am afraid of all things, even to think but I must go on my wayThe stake we play for is life and death, or more than these, and we must not flinch
5 November, morning-Let me be accurate in everything, for though you and I have seen some strange things together, you may at the first think that I, Van Helsing, am madThat the many horrors and the so long strain on nerves has at the last turn my brain
All yesterday we travel, always getting closer to the mountains, and moving into a more and more wild and desert landThere are great, frowning precipices and much falling water, and Nature seem to have held sometime her carnivalMadam Mina still sleep and sleepAnd though I did have hunger and appeased it, I could not waken her, even for foodI began to fear that the fatal spell of the place was upon her, tainted as she is with that Vampire baptism"Well," said I to myself, "if it be that she sleep all the day, it shall also be that I do not sleep at night As we travel on the rough road, for a road of an ancient and imperfect kind there was, I held down my head and slept
Again I waked with a sense of guilt and of time passed, and found Madam Mina still sleeping, and the sun low downBut all was indeed changedThe frowning mountains seemed further away, and we were near the top of a steep rising hill, on summit of which was such a castle as Jonathan tell of in his diaryAt once I exulted and fearedFor now, for good or ill, the end was near
I woke Madam Mina, and again tried to hypnotize her, but alas! unavailing till too lateThen, ere the great dark came upon us, for even after down sun the heavens reflected the gone sun on the snow, and all was for a time in a great twilightI took out the horses and fed them in what shelter I couldThen I make a fire, and near it I make Madam Mina, now awake and more charming than ever, sit comfortable amid her rugsI got ready food, but she would not eat, simply saying that she had not hungerI did not press her, knowing her |
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